Nosy Aunt Josie received a request for specific advice. The writer's son is not married to, but has two children with, a person for whom he cares deeply. She is about to give birth to a third child and there is a question as to whether the child is his. The son's mother asked whether she should visit immediately or await the results of a paternity test (two days).
Initially Aunt Josie thought that waiting the two days might be the prudent thing to do. However, on reconsideration, the answer depends on whether the writer's son intends to treat the child as his own no matter the results of the paternity test, whether the writer's son intends to stay with the mother of his other two children, whether the baby's mother needs the support, and whether the son's mother can support this family irrespective of the baby's paternity. Aunt Josie now votes for going as soon as possible and supporting the new family if the answers to most of the above questions are "Yes."
It should be pointed out that this baby is an innocent born into a complex situation. It could probably use all the love and support it can get, especially from older wiser "grandparents." Hope this is a better answer.
