Wednesday, December 26, 2012

When to Get Off the Pot

This post is directed primarily to my single female readers who care about having their own biological children and are waiting for that special someone to come through and pop "the question."  If you have been with someone for a substantial period of time (not less than 2 years), have hinted broadly that you would like to become engaged, get married, have children, etc. in the not-too-distant future, and have listened carefully to the response to those broad hints from your significant other, and no proposal is forthcoming, here are your options:

1.  Continue to wait while your biological clock is ticking.

2.  Set a dead-line for the hoped-for response and communicate said deadline clearly to you beloved.

3.  Give an ultimatum now.  (This depends on your willingness to follow through with the ultimatum.)

4.  Break-up and be open to finding another partner.

If you are female and older, Option 1 is the riskiest because it continues to eat up valuable time.
Option 2 is viable no matter what stage you are in  as long as you realize that "no decision" is a decision in and of itself at some point.  Option 3 cuts to the chase.  It should not be pursued if one is unprepared to follow through on the ultimatum.  However, if you have been seeing someone for an extensive period of time, perhaps you owe yourself the truth about where the relationship is going.  Option 4, the position that most women who have invested time in the relationship really don't want to be in, is still better than nagging a beloved or trying to force someone to do something that they really do not want to do.

So, ladies, here it is.  None of the above should be pursued without fully discussing your hopes, dreams and aspirations for the relationship with your partner and listening carefully to what they are hoping, dreaming and aspiring to also.  Good luck.