What do you do when you are in relationship purgatory? You know the person's not "the One" intellectually, but you do not have a "love jones," i.e., romantic addiction to that person. They are, however, hovering around in your life and they are convenient. Moving on and up can be more difficult than for the person with the love addiction because those folks know that they are addicted to the person who is definitely not right for them and often makes them feel terrible about themselves. In relationship purgatory, the other person is often "in love" with you and may be a genuinely wonderful person, just not a good fit for you as a mate. How does one escape? The short answer is that you must definitively and strongly cut ties. You probably cannot be a "friend" to this person without falling back into purgatory. If you can move or dramatically change your circumstances, it's easier. If not, just as with those who have "love addictions," you must stay vigilant and extremely strong to escape.
Dating others and keeping busy really does help. Not dwelling on your feelings of loneliness also helps. Convenience and inaction will not get you what you want. You have to be strong, cut the ties, and keep looking for the One, who is out there somewhere.
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